The Balance

I guess this blogpost comes out of a simmering internal frustration I've been carrying with me the last few weeks. Not to say that this is something negative it's just something that's been on my mind for a while now.

Over the past fews months I've actually been pretty busy with live briefs, so much so a heck-of-a-lot of my work for Extended Practice so far have been live briefs as I don't really have the time to focus on self initiated things right now. I've been lucky however, in the fact that a lot of the briefs I've been doing have given me a lot of creative freedom and room for play, so none of them have really felt restrictive, or like they're a burden on my creative soul. I get to work with really great people right now. That's pretty super.

HOWEVER all this fun stuff has come at a cost. In complete honesty I've been neglecting COP a lot more than I ever should have. I've been working on it every week, but I've been prioritizing my Extended Practice work as it's something that I really enjoy. I'm on this course because I love to make images, not because I enjoy writing analytical and cold academic essays and dissertations about theorists that I don't particularly care for. COP has been the black cloud over my soul for weeks now. And the thought of having to bring in aspects of theory that don't interest me just so my dissertation can tick enough boxes to be academically researched feels so much like grade chasing. I've lost the heart for COP which is sad. Last year it was one of the modules I enjoyed the most, but the thorough academic rigour I've had to go through for this essay has slowly eroded that initial excitement away. It's a little heartbreaking that me and COP have ended up like this. We used to get along so well, now our relationship just feels like something I have to get through.

It's frustrating too, that the more extended practice I do and the more people I meet, the more I feel like I'm growing into a professional practitioner. I've started extending my contacts and network which is in turn getting me more work. But I feel bad about doing it because I know I should be doing COP.

Me looking at my COP blog

This entire situation has had me thinking about myself and my practice for quite a while. I know leaving this course I have no interest whatsoever in pursuing a Masters or similar qualification. While essay writing was kind of fun, dissertation writing is sucking the creative soul out of my body.

I guess in the end it's just made me excited to leave and get on with doing this full time. I absolutely love it at LCA but I feel like I'm chewing at my leash to be free! Illustration and communication is what excites me and makes me feel happy, not the necessary written element I know I need to have in order to get a good grade. I'm excited to make work all the time, and to wave my dear friend COP goodbye.

The Power of Good People

My Headingley Virgin Media Box

Yesterday I had a meeting with David, one of the co-founders and owners of Independent Leeds. He found me through my instagram feed earlier this week after I tagged their page in my Headingley Virgin Media box painting. After commenting on my work and sending me a direct message we decided to organise a meeting to discuss a possible future project together, I was a little nervous about the meeting before hand as I didn't really know what the content of our conversation would be, but I feel familiar with Independent Leeds, and they've done a ton of features and work with LCA students before so I felt comfortable going forward.

Though I can't currently discuss ideas and concepts for the issue I'll be involved with, I can state it'll be the March edition and we're thinking of doing a piece that I'll be both writing and illustrating; which is really exciting for me!! I've done bits and pieces of writing for publications and interviews before and it's something I quite enjoy. Writing about something I feel passionate about is liberating, and allowing my tone of voice to come through across both literature and visual pieces is something that has gradually become an important aspect of my practice. I enjoy the juxtaposition of word and image and as someone who feels like they always have a lot to say this gives me an opportunity to say it.

Practical aspects aside, what really struck me from this meeting was the power of meeting good people. While discussing the importance of championing independent business and people David said

"The future is small. The future is individual people and small communities."

and it really struck me as something powerful. Massive corporations and big businesses just aren't something that particularly interest me. I don't care in the slightest about doing things simply because they have to be done. I hate box ticking and people who are apathetic and illustration that is lazy and void. And what I love is meeting people like David who genuinely give a shit about what they do.

While we were talking we found out we only used to live a couple of streets away from each other for a few years in Hull. We knew similar people. We had different connections that we were interested in. Between the two of us there was an entire network of passionate people and just speaking to David made me feel genuinely great about being a human being and being exactly where I was. He had built himself a network in which inbetween meeting at a coffee shop, going to the Independent Leeds HQ and walking back into town we bumped into numerous people who knew him. People who smiled and asked how he was and it was just so inspiring to see someone doing what they loved doing and doing well at it. It made me think a lot about my own practice and how important I am to that. I've always believed it's better to meet up with people. Speaking is better than email. Laughing is better than lol-ing. The whole thing just made me feel happy and hopeful that I can have a practice that means so much more than a paycheck at the end of the day. That I can be honest to myself and still be taken seriously in the business world. And that human kindness is still important.